Our Farewell Video

Massy wants to go to India. We say thank you. Off we go on Thursday!

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The perfect time to be unprepared

Today wasn’t supposed to look like this. Actually, this whole month wasn’t supposed to unfold like it did. I had the perfect plan: spend the entire month of August continuing to prepare physically, mentally, and spiritually for our trip to India.

August 1st came and went. So did the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th; instead of being filled with a perfectly balanced agenda the days were filled with the chaos and the unplanned. You see, I’m the girl that has it all planned out before a big trip. Even road trips to see family send me to my “happy place” of organizational skills. I pack the suitcase, toiletries, and snack bag all in perfect organized bliss. I lay our outfits out the night before and painstakingly go over my list for the third time before getting into bed as scheduled. That is what August was meant to look like.

However, doctor appointments took the place of any preparation I had hoped for. The eight appointments this month have left me exhausted in the three areas of my life that I had hoped to rejuvenate prior to leaving. Matt and I have been distracted from our trip to India to say the least. We have completed all of the practical tasks, but in the midst of one waiting room or another we became distracted. Honestly, I felt guilty earlier in the month when I realized that this trip wasn’t getting the attention that I had hoped to give it. I wanted to truly invest all of my heart and soul into the preparation. I wanted to feel “ready”. 

After sleeping for 13 hours last night and dragging groggily through the day today, I realized that I may not be ready like I wanted to be. I may get off of the plane in India and not be ready at all. I thought about it more–what I could have done to feel more “arrived”, “ready”, and “prepared” at this point in time. I looked at the calendar on the refrigerator and realized that my lack of organization hasn’t been lack of desire, but rather lack of time and energy. This whole time I have wanted to become some polished and spiritual version of myself–one that is ready to help orphans and meet those in need when I get to India.

That’s what churches do before they “send out” a team of missionaries or teen volunteers, isn’t it? They prepare for months and they dig deep into educating themselves on the culture and how they will help the lost and poor. That is what I wanted–to be so immersed in the trip to India that I would feel as if I were grounded when I got there; that I was somehow ready to take on the challenges. I laugh to myself now as I write this because I realize we’re going to an entirely different culture than our own. We’re going to be exposed to poverty like never before. Even the sounds, smells, and feel in the air will be different. This isn’t just going to the grocery store with a list of items and your reusable shopping bags. My best organizational skills won’t prepare us for this trip. I admire the teams that have the time and discipline to equip themselves for missions trips, but I’m sure even they end up in the corner crying at one point or another because of the culture shock. I am learning that that is okay. In fact, I almost expect to come unraveled. 

Life just hasn’t allowed me to prepare in the ways that I wanted to. I understand now that if I had been able to feel completely prepared then I would have been presenting some fraudulent version of myself. Today, I realized that we’re only 17 days away from embarking on our Indian adventure. A slight panic arose in me. I realized how unprepared I am to share with those we will come in contact with. I felt so inadequate to offer any help to them. As I sat there in my own doubt and fear I was reminded that this trip is not for me. It’s not about what I can offer. It’s not even about me utilizing my skills to help these people. Maybe some churches get it a little “wrong” in that respect. It’s not about what we can do for this person or that people group. That conveys that the trip is about us and our skill set.  Sometimes maybe the mission is to just be–be available, be willing, and most of all be unprepared in a sense.

In just 11 days I will begin packing our bags and organizing the toiletries to my specifications. I will go to my “happy place” and make sure that our passports will be placed in the carry on bag between a book and a magazine. I will be in the clothes that were lain out the night before and I’ll get on the plane ill prepared, but with the promise of God on all sides of me–that he never leaves us and that his strength is made perfect in weakness.


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A Tangible Need

     God did it! We have raised all of the funds that we need for our trip to India in September. We are going to dedicate a video update to that, though.

    First, there is a new need that we have been made aware of–one that is far more greater than the funding of our missions trip. Matt and I have decided that we will donate any financial donations that are made from this point on to the ministry we will be volunteering with while we are in India. I messaged the ministry to ask what their most urgent need is right now and the director of the ministry replied,

“As far as something to give towards, we have about 12 beds right now that do not have matresses. The kids are sleeping on plywood until we can afford some matresses. They are about $75 for a twin matress. That would be a great need. We want to get them before  winter…so the kids will be warm.”

    I am sure that all of you that read this have a warm bed to sleep in at night. I laid in bed last night thinking of those without. A mattress. It’s something that I know I take for granted. Matt and I are hoping that we can raise the full amount ($900) for 12 twin mattresses to be purchased for the orphanage. We realize that many of you have already given generously to our trip and we are very thankful. Beyond airline tickets and the costs of our trip, there is an even greater need.

     You see, we are in the process of seeking God’s will and his calling for our lives in regards to India. The fact that we physically get to go there to be introduced to the country and people we have fallen in love with from a distance is amazing! However, there are people there right now that are actively working to make a difference and spread God’s hope. Mattresses seem like a small need to us, but that is because we all own one. Would you consider donating the cost of one mattress or contributing a small amount toward the total cost?

Here are some ideas:

-Sacrifice going to Starbucks twice a week. That’s easily $10 toward a mattress for a child in need.

-Cleaning out your home this summer? Have a yard sale! Any contribution of what you raise can make a big difference for a child in India.

-Thinking of starting Christmas shopping early this year? Set aside some money to give a gift that will keep giving. Make the joy of Christmas spread beyond your family and into a child’s life.

-All that loose change in your car, couch, and purse must really get on your nerves! Cash it all in and donate it toward the cost of a mattress.

 We’re thankful for family and friends that have supported us so willingly and have generous hearts. If you would like to donate the cost of one mattress ($75) or toward the cost of one please e-mail me at: kristinanewbauer@hotmail.com or message me on Facebook. Thank you so much!

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It’s Getting Real

    In about two months we will be on Indian soil. It’s hard to believe how quickly everything has come together. We still have money to raise and visas to obtain, but we have complete peace that we’re going to be within reach of the people we have loved from a distance for so long. God has opened the doors and the burden that has been placed on our hearts is going to become more than a feeling and transform into action. That’s the way that it’s supposed to be, right? Our hearts are filled with purpose and then we are given the opportunity to allow that purpose to flow from us. It won’t be locked up anymore.

       The past month has been hectic for us and without a doubt very stressful. We were blessed to have time with family and friends which was the calm before the storm. As my health took a turn down an unexpected road, the door to India seemed to go untouched. Outside opinions flooded in and encouraged us to postpone the trip. I have to admit that the second guesses and advice filled me with fear. Matt and I reflected on how the doors to India have opened, though. It was something completely out of our control that came together without a hitch. Only God.

       Faith is something that as small as it may be, still needs to be bigger than us. It’s something that fills the very corners of a fearful heart and tells it to keep moving–keep dreaming. Faith is what’s planning this trip. Faith will follow us and sometimes it may even lead the way through the darkness before us. Faith isn’t a feeling, but it’s a state of heart, mind, and soul.

       ” There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:18


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Break My Heart For What Breaks Yours… An Interview…

Here is a post from a Blog that our fabulous friend and professional blogger Marcy publishes. She posted a two-part interview with Nikki and I about our heart for India and our trip in September.. Read it and also check out Marcy’s blog…she’s a star!

Marcaritaville's Blog

A couple of years ago God was on a mission to bring Kevin and I together with two very special people, Matt and Nikki Newbauer. We met, and have been family ever since. Now, Matt and Nikki moved away *insert sad tears here*, but we are still family. A few months back, Nikki began sharing with me the desire God had placed in her heart. My friend Nikki has a heart for women, she is probably one of the strongest women-of-faith that I have ever met. So when she told me that God was moving she and Matt to do something about the child trafficking in India, it really came as no surprise. We spent close to an hour on the phone that day as she told me the history of this call, and all the events leading up to she and Matt just KNOWING this is what they were going to do…

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Interview Part II… Matt and Nikki are going on a great adventure!

Here is part two of Marcy’s interview with Nikki and I…

Marcaritaville's Blog

For those who fell in love with Nikki last week from her interview (It is pretty much impossible NOT to, she is just so loving!), here is the second part to our interview~

What are the most important things about child trafficking we need to know?

The stats on Human Trafficking are heart wrenching. You may find statistics at here:

The statistics in the above link are dated 2007, but the horror of Human Trafficking has only increased in five years that have passed since the article was written. With any inhumane situation out there, though, there is hope. Thankfully, there are people out there that are combating Human Trafficking every day. When reading the stories behind modern day slavery, it doesn’t take long for your heart to break.
I think that the most important thing to realize about Human Trafficking is that those trafficked truly are victims in every…

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